Sunflower seeds

Recently I have been tucking a few sunflower seeds into my cheek while working. I cannot think of another snacking item that is so socially divisive as these seeds. They constantly require one to noisily spit small bits of wood from one's mouth, and contain so much sodium as to make one's face bloated and unseemly, so that in just a matter of days one bears resemblance to a George Washington who's gone a round in the ring with Tyson. Particularly if one wears a baldiwig and silk knickers, as I do.

No one enjoys my new habit of eating sunflower seeds.